Oh, the deliciously sweet and agonisingly painful irony of
being me. I don't know where to start. I'd love to start where
there was something that wasn't ironic, but alas, I'm through and
through it seems the blunt joke of the Universe. I'm the sum of
diametrically opposed odds. It's not what I want, but, do any
of us get to choose in these times? F-it, I'm rolling with it.
I
have an ability to write, and write a lot. One small problem, I'm
piss poor at grammar – and I guess I should add I'm terrible at
following rules. I think these are the reasons I can write actually.
I have no hold ups. I write the way I think. I suppose in some
eyes that's probably a bad thing. My thinking has no hold ups
either, other than the small caveat, I try to use logic to the best of my
ability – not that I always succeed, but that I always attempt to.
I'm degreed in math, and I have a huge passion for it, but irony
strikes again, I'm terrible at sitting down and doing it. I'm
actually more passionate about math than writing – or at least I
keep telling myself that. The day has arrived where I need things to
survive via some means that exchanges ultra dirty green paper for
things that help me aim at this goal of happiness. I'm not sure
either of these things have true value, but it seems to be the trendy
thing to get what you need. So I'm going to give it a go, once I
figure out how to.
This is my personal blog. This has no aim
other than saying where I'm at day to day in life. It's like my
journal, but for you! For me it is a sketch pad, a tour de force in
chaos spewed unapologetically. It is most likely a semi-accurate
projection of me and my days onto a 2 dimensional plane, squeezed
into the tiny frame work of this ancient mode of communication, and
shot down tubes to your image capturing devices. Imagine blogging
when we're all hooked up to the web via neural connections, throwing
our thoughts like javelins out into web space and into other peoples'
meaty neuro-space? Sounds fun, I can't wait.
What
else? Oh yea!! Let us not forget me. Ha, yea, me. The me
that few people know about yet, but many more are about to. I am a
transgender female. That's right, I'm the 1% of the 1% that most
people fear the most. I'm a fire breathing transsexual female who
does calculus in her head. The
irony is, besides the obvious, that I have the biggest heart for
people. But because of the small mindedness of the majority's
opinions of people, I'm seen by the anti-LGBT vocal some, as a demon out to hurt,
trick, and destroy people – nothing could be further from the
truth.
Reading
this blog you'll get to watch, err, read, about me changing and living. I'm
sure I'll have some sorta pic-ta-do thingy or something for you to
see, eventually, but for now, just words. You'll get to see me
stumble, fall, and break ego-bones, and hopefully wobble on, as I try
to find a way to survive and move towards my dreams – or out of the
one I'm in. So I invite you to read along about my adventures as I grow as
a person in a world that seems to be a wee bit hostile to me. Maybe I'll be able to plant some roses along
the way, slay some dragons with tensor calculus, and find a cute pair of heels.
